MommaCan's Journal

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13 October 2023

**I was super proud of myself yesterday.** It was my first 500 calorie day and I did it and did not cave! I closed all of my rings again, drank all of my water and cooked shrimp for the first time. =) Lunch ended up being a challenge due to time and the fact that I had nothing prepped. Nonetheless, when I only had 15 minutes to eat I was able to figure out a pretty quick easy and low calorie meal on the fly! Plus, I did not cave in the evening (my habit) when my spouse wanted to order pizza. Overall a win for the day and I was very proud and happy.

Then around 11:15pm my husband woke me up to share that our son's hamster was out and - well - we have cats so he needed to be caught. Silly little hamster, he's gotten out before and usually comes right to me but last night was a different night. He got scared and bit my finger pretty good. We were able to clean my hamster bite and the floors (blood everywhere) and get him safely to his habitat. I took some Advil and went back to bed around 12:15.

To my surprise, I started to cry. Knowing that they say tears can release the hormone that contributes to depression I decided to just let it go. I understand that losing weight is not just a physical journey but also a mental/emotional one. I thought about what could be bothering me. Last night it was the relationship between my spouse and me and the example I am setting for my son.

In my husband's family I have long thought they (paternal side) treat his mother like a second class citizen. They have their issues, all families do, but my husband was always super sweet and caring toward his mother. He is also caring and sweet towards me but he holds traditional expectations of male/female household roles.

In our household, my spouse is the caregiver for our son - he takes him to school, makes his lunch, helps with the homework, takes him to afterschool activities, etc. He does this while I work. I work from home and I am the main income for our household. My husband will do the shopping, dishes, floors every week or so, put laundry away and occasionally he will clean a bathroom. If I want a clean house or dinner then I am left to do the rest - and miss out the time with my family on the weekends or miss out sleeping time on weeknights.

So last night, after cleaning up the hamster mess I went to the restroom and saw the trash overflowing and it all just bubbled up. My son sees his father sitting on the couch while I am always running around. Our son hears us arguing over having a dirty house. Ultimately, our son sees me being disrespected as a female - and an equal - and he see me accepting being treated like that and THAT is hard to accept. My husband is not a monster - he actually has a pretty bad back injury and he works through numb legs, etc. - but the minimal housework is not something that is going to put his back out; not participating is his choice. It is not something that is going to be solved so I just have to figure out how to teach my son that it is not ok...even thought I allow it to be. Anyway, that was my demon at midnight last night.

I am fine today - it is what it is and I am lucky to have what I do. I weighed the same as yesterday which is still a win. I feel good and I am going to keep on with this plan!

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
97.3 kg	4.7 kg	36.1 kg	Reasonably Well

(1 comment) Gaining 0.3 kg a Week

12 October 2023

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12 October 2023

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I was able to ride the bike for 30 minutes in the morning and take a 30 minute walk - I actually exceeded my 60 minute exercise goal and I was very very proud to close all three of my rings! I can not remember the last time I did that. Two days ago I increased my exercise ring to 60 minutes and my active calories to 800. I am not sure what my active calories should be but I was only around 880 so maybe it is ok. I am going to look into it.

Today is my 500 calorie intake day. I am going to take pictures of my meals and I think I have a good plan. I was also really excited to drop another pound.

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
97.3 kg	4.8 kg	36.1 kg	Reasonably Well

Add Comment Losing 4.1 kg a Week

11 October 2023

Yesterday was a great day! I rode the bike for 20 minutes and also went for a 20 minute walk. I had my exercise ring set for 30 minutes and I told my son it would be completed by the time he came home. Well - after I surpassed my goal, I change it to 60 minutes per day! This morning I have completed a 30 minute bike ride and plan a 30 minute walk later today! I noticed today that my complexion is improving and I still have good energy. I was worried about dinner and making it within my designated 8 hours. I was still frantically running around at 7pm when my window closed and ended up eating too much outside of the window. I am not that worried - I am excited about the fact that I am exercising and focusing on eating healthy - I feel good and I will continue to keep at it!

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
97.9 kg	4.2 kg	36.7 kg	Reasonably Well

Add Comment Losing 1.9 kg a Week

10 October 2023

Yesterday was pretty good ~ I was able to complete the 500 calorie fast, get a 30 minute walk in and stay on track. Today is a free calorie day but I am going to try to stick to 1200-1500, continue to drink at least a gallon of water each day and now that I know for the 10lb weight loss challenge I should limit my carb intake I will focus on that too. I still really enjoy my ACV drink each morning and today actually wondered if I was going to start to migrate away from my beloved cinnamon coffee!

So far today has been pretty good too! I got a 20 minute beginner bike ride in and decided that I think I am ready to progress beyond the beginner rides. I feel really good and I still plan on taking my 30 minute walk later today with my husband! That was a bonus from yesterday - he went with me! Today we will take the dog and just be in the moment.

Tonight is going to be a challenge but I think I got it with planning. My 8 hours is between 11am-7pm. My son has soccer practice from 515-615pm but sometimes they go late. This soccer practice is the whole reason for my 11am-7pm window. My natural window would be 8am-4pm. It took me last week to get used to the 11am start time. Anyway, we won't have a ton of time so I will need to cook/prep later today (during my lunch when I am not walking) to keep on top of it!

Bonus was I lost a few pounds! I am feeling good and ready to keep on track!

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
98.2 kg	3.9 kg	36.9 kg	Reasonably Well

Add Comment Losing 6.4 kg a Week

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