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frustrated. i feel like i've made such a big change to my routine...and the numbers just don't show it. i'm enjoying being more active. i do think that i'm starting to look a little bit better. i definitely feel better...but it's not enough. just talked to my husband about it. i guess he was trying to be supportive in his own way...but to me it sounded like he was blaming me. saying things like i must not be counting my calories properly, and questioning how i could possibly burning as many calories as this website says. it all just sounds like he thinks i'm not doing enough. for all of last week, i pushed all the living room furniture against the wall...and lay a huge mat over the carpet for yoga and cardio everyday. we go on bike rides together on weekend mornings, or on his off day before i go to work. we've been jogging. i play basketball with him. i literally limit myself to 1/3 or what he eats. and do my absolute best to skip what he eats when its the chips, fried food, freezies, frozen entrees and pizzas that he always wants us to have on hand.
i cook the meals. i know what i put into them. i need some encouragement.
instead i was told when you gave up sugar for lent i could see a difference every week. well ummm....yeah...i was losing weight. now, i barely am. at the time, we were really stepping up our efforts to get pregnant, and he agreed not to eat out, and consume more vegetables, eggs and nuts to help his fertility. now that i'm not as strict about it, junk food is the number one choice. because i spend more time exercising, i spend less time cooking. he seems to only eat what i cook once, and then leave the rest in the fridge to go bad if i don't take it for lunch at work. i'm not trying to come down on him. his metabolism is different. he's trying to gain weight, and that has become an excuse to eat bullshit every day. he's gaining weight...and i'm not gaining weight. i guess that should be a victory...but it sucks. i only wanted to lose ten lbs. i wanted to go from 150 to 140. Some people do that in a week. 4 weeks in, i'm barely past where i started. fighting temptation daily. and feeling like giving up if all the extra effort amounts to landing right back where I started. Anyhoo...that's where I'm at. I welcome encouraging words, tips, anecdotal stories from anyone who even cares how i'm feeling. i know my diet isn't perfect. i know my weight isn't that high. i know my progress isn't that bad...but i don't have a good track record of following through when things aren't going my way. i feel so alone in this...
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2678 kcal
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Fat: 125.65g | Prot: 127.92g | Carbs: 240.63g.
Breakfast: whole wheat bread, omelette. Lunch: arizona iced tea, chicken legs bbq, rice, grilled zucchini, grilled peppers. Dinner: sampler platter. Snacks/Other: drumstick ice cream, pineapple, cherries. more...
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1812 kcal
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Exercise:
Desk Work - 5 hours and 30 minutes, Resting - 10 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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